A Yorozuyasoul Christmas
by MerryRead
Summary: It's Christmas, and Gintoki is kind of forced by certain annoying glasses to invite Otose and co. for the party. The Yorozuya three wait for them to finish cleaning up the establishment, but the ongoing conversation takes an emotional turn, causing the samurai to have a flashback about memories preferred to be forgotten ...


Welcome to my first story! This story was written as a Christmas gift for a member of the Yorozuyasoul forum. Merry (belated) Christmas and a happy New Year, Yell!

First of all, let me warn you: I'm a complete amateur at writing novel-like stories, or fanfics in this case. In fact, I don't really like writing fanfics because it's so _damn hard_ to properly portray the characters as they are in the original. I hope I didn't go too OOC in this story. Another problem with anime and manga fanfics is that I'm at a bit of a loss what to do with the suffixes after the names. It just sounds wrong when leaving them out. So much info hidden in those little words is completely lost that way. So I kept them as much as possible during dialogues. Also, don't mind the centered triple dots, there only there because I wanted to get some white space between the parts. This was the sole way to make it happen.

There may appear updates every now and then, but don't let them fool you; the story is really complete. The purpose of these updates consists of the correction of spelling mistakes, and the upgrading of grammar and sentence construction. Nothing major. No plot points will be added anymore.

Did add a few changes in the story 'though; I mainly didn't like how Sakamoto just popped up the second time. He needed some excuse to win back the lost time, so that's fixed. And I put in something extra with it because the manga just reminded me of it. Good old Gorilla-sensei.

...

Anyway, a little guide:

_Words in italics are thoughts._

**Words in bold are said with emphasis.**

(1) Anego: the way Kagura calls Tae, Shinpachi's sister. It's in the same mannerism as a yakuza would call a woman (s)he deeply respects.

(2) NEET: a person who is Not in Education, Employment, or Training.

(3) Takachiisai: combination of Takasugi and chiisai, meaning small.

(4) Koropokkuru: a race of small people in Japanese folklore.

...

Want music to accompany sad parts? I recommend Olivier Deriviere – Corruption with rage and melancholy (during the discovery in the flashback and its emotional backlash), Zack Hemsey – Vengeance (when chasing after Takasugi) and Adrian Von Ziegler – Even in death (right after the flashback). I used them to write this, after all. Along with some character OSTs (mainly Takasugi's and Katsura's).

* * *

"Oi granny, what's taking you so long?"

A samurai with an outrageously silver perm entered the by now empty snack bar. At the sound of his voice, the dressed up landlady turned her head towards him, blowing out smoke from her 120' cigarette like a deep sigh. She seemed to carry herself with a certain grace, impossible to hide by her old age.

"Now I've had to come and fetch you myself," the listless man continued disgruntled, scratching the back of his head, "Usually you barge in unannounced for the Christmas party upstairs. What was wrong with that tradition? I would be able to appreciate it if you stopped doing it during the year though. Along with your cronies."

"Come now Gin-san, you could've at least invited her. That would be the polite thing to do, you know." a plain-looking teenage boy reprimanded him while walking in the establishment, followed by a younger girl chewing on a su konbu strip.

The pale girl in Chinese dress however commented with disapproval: "Hmph. We don't need old women joining us during the party. Neither are thieves welcome. They'd only steal all of our meat, leaving us with poor pieces of vegetables. Young ladies like I need their proteins to grow, papy always said."

Gintoki threw a bored look at the spectacled boy. "Kagura is right. One Meat Monster is enough. Maybe we should explain to these women how proteins tend to fatten up their bodies, turning them into piggies. On the other hand, we'll have plenty of meat again by then." The next instant he dropped to the floor, chopped on the head by said powerful girl's knifehand strike.

Otose sighed for real this time, ignoring the penniless jack-of-all-trades's insults. "We've had some bothersome drunks as clients at closing time," she explained, "Nothing tama couldn't handle, though. So we're a bit late with cleaning things up. Besides, you're only after the Dionysos wine I'd bring with me anyway, you hog."

The supple warrior picked himself up and put himself on one of the bar stools, to counter her accusation at once. "No way. I was just being sympathetic, you know. Once a person reaches a certain age, they don't want to be reminded about the years passing by anymore. So I was thinking to quickly grab the wine and leave you in peace," He made a gesture as if he was being overly generous, "And here you are, incriminating the good Samaritan. Ahh, Gin-san's feelings are hurt!"

"What am I, a middle-aged woman who's going to throw a birthday party?!" all grace disappeared temporarily from the landlady's figure, "And it's about the wine after all, isn't it?!"

Shinpachi tried to calm down the situation while taking a seat himself: "Whatever the case, it doesn't really matter, does it? You're still invited, Otose. And Catherine and Tama too, of course."

Remembering someone was already missing, Kagura directed herself at Shinpachi: "Oi Shinpachi, where's Anego(1)?"

"Sister? Oh, she was chasing away Kondou-san. She'll be here later on." He replied as if driving off stalkers was the most normal thing to do.

On that notion, Gintoki began to scan the premises, reaching for his wooden sword. "Talking about stalkers, mine hasn't shown up yet. What's she up to again?"

After checking all tables and stools were lined up well, the robot maid Tama now joined the conversation: "I do not understand. What is the advantage in stalking behaviour? Do they not get hated by their targets? I'm clearly still lacking a lot of data."

The teenage boy pushed up his glasses, and helpfully tried to answer the robot's questions. "I believe they're satisfied with them being able to see their object of love whenever they want. Which is all day long. It's some sort of obsessive behaviour, which is generally perceived as harassment and intimidation to the target. It could be felt as a manner of domination or superiority to the stalker in question. They usually don't immediately set the next step like people should do in normal relationships, confessing their feelings, or can't accept being shot down by their love – "

Bam!

"Alright, enough!" the annoyed samurai slapped him on the head, "What are you, studying to become a full-fletched encyclopedia?! Let's just shorten it to this: they want to make babies with their victim, but don't get to!"

"What kind of abridged version is thaaaaaaaat?!" Shinpachi screamed reproachfully.

The android confirmed: "Stalkers are people who want to make a baby with their target, but will never be able to. Example: Gintoki-sama and the weather girl. Data saved. Thank you for the explanations, everyone!"

Gintoki almost choked. "T-T-Tama, that's not how it is! Listen, okay? Gin-san will describe it once again, okay? I and Ketsuno Ana are still a possibility, see? Are you listening? Hey, Tama? ..."

While the flustered man tried to persuade Tama on editing her data, Catherine sneered at them. "Hmph. You lowly men only think about getting inside women all the time. Even though the result looks all wrinkly and ugly, and are more trouble than they're worth. Take an example on smart ladies like me and Otose, we know how to enjoy life!"

"That's just because you're too repulsive to attract even one man, cat monster," The newly titled stalker clarified as he took place on his stool again, "Not to mention I heard male cats are geared up with something painful on their private parts."

Her shouted reaction came promptly and accompanied by a severely distorted face: "That has nothing to do with it, you ugly perm! And where did you hear the latter from anyway?!"

Her threatening lunge towards the rude samurai made him back away swiftly."Uwah! Keep that monstrous face of yours away from me, fiend!"

"Talking about kids, may I ask why you never got any children, Otose?" The curious boy suddenly realized his question was exceptionally straightforward, and hastily added stutteringly: "Y-y-you don't have to answer if you don't want to, o-of course!"

Otose looked straight in his eyes. Next thing they knew, the foul-mouthed yato replied in her stead. "Don't be stupid, Shinpachi. You need to have sex to get kids. Mamy told even me how it goes, she said they did it like rabbits. As if granny was able to trap a man stupid enough to do that with her, looking the way she does."

Gintoki started to hurl. "Thanks for the awful picture, Kagura."

"What the hell are you imagining, you damn brats?!" the old woman yelled, "And stop devouring our rice for tomorrow, you gluttonous kid!"

Tama interjected while sweeping the bar counter: "I'd like to see you get a kid, Gintoki-sama. My data mentions that a kid has a significant likeness to the parents's personalities, especially during their youth. I wonder what personality elements he or she would inherit from you."

"That sounds really promising with him as a father. By having to take care of his troublesome child, he might actually learn what kind of annoyance he proves to be to others. I'd feel for the wife 'though." Shinpachi's sister Tae pridefully crossed the threshold with three bento boxes in her arms.

"The hell's that supposed to mean?!" the NEET(2) reacted indignant, but not without throwing a fearful glimpse at the boxes she put on the bar counter.

"Exactly what I'm saying."

Kagura agreed: "Based on how much Gin-chan lazes around, wastes money, abuses people and drinks until the early morning, he couldn't have been anything but a delinquent, nope!"

"Oi oi, I'll let you know, little Gin-kun was a good kid!" argued Gintoki upset, holding up a hand, "He diligently went to school _(otherwise Sensei'd drag him along by his neck)_, nicely helped out his friends and neighbours_ (for pocket money)_, and swept the premises of his home every day _(or wouldn't get food)_. Well, there were of course some bad days. For example those few times I smacked some people over the head with my sword when they were being annoying, but those were justified. And possibly also when I and that idiot were playing Amanto treasure hunt during the geography self-study session, and drew all over the walls with this difficult to erase ink. Ah, and there's that one snowball fight, where I put stones in my snowball and threw them at the stuck-up bastard who ratted me out for cutting Zura's hair. You know, the usual drill, but nothing too bad. A kid's gotta live."

"Uwaah, somehow I've got the feeling you're hiding quite a lot more mischief behind those words, Gin-san." Shinpachi remarked baffled.

The cheeky girl shrugged, nibbling on some more su konbu. "Totally normal stuff. You're just too plain, you ordinary straight man."

In his defence, Tae explained: "Our late father didn't really give us a chance to act impudent. He possessed a lot of pride for the family name, and wanted us to uphold that honour. It wasn't easy, but I believe we fulfilled his wishes to the best we could."

"I'm at least happy my father told us he was proud of me and my sister before he passed on ..." the young samurai added with a forlorn smile.

Gintoki cast him a sidelong glance. A deep silence fell down upon the group. Then ...

"Dohwaaaaaaaaaahh!" a well-aimed roundhouse kick hit Shinpachi square in the chest, causing him to rocket backwards and land in a heap on one of the tables at the opposite wall.

"What are you gloating about, huuuh?! Trying to boast about your old man, you rotten four-eyes?!" Kagura ran up to him and seized him by his yukata. "You brat, you're a thousand years too early to be comparing your papy to my papy! When yours was still playing with swords on this planet, mine was already beating down bad guys with his fists on thousands of other planets at the same time, Oraaah!"

"Aren't you the one acting like a kid and comparing our fatheeeers?!" the glasses screamed horrified.

"Kagura-chan, that's not how he meant it. He just wanted to say our father confessed us that he had pride in us, since he liked how strong of a woman I had become while always retaining my graceful composure and beauty. And was delighted by how independent I'd become, making my own tasty food." Tae walked smilingly towards the rampaging yato in order to calm her down.

Catherine however interfered aggressively by raising a bar stool above her head and throwing it at the struggling pair, which missed them by only a hair. "You monster girl, how dare you mess up the place I cleaned a second ago?!"

"Oiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii, could you maybe not help them break the furniture that's just been put away in order?!" Otose bellowed in exasperation, slamming her hands on the counter.

Gintoki observed the usual scene of domestic violence play out before his heavy lidded eyes. His mind however was still hooked on some earlier thought. _Proud ... would Sensei have been proud of him? Or rather disappointed, for failing to uphold his promise? _Gintoki shook his head. _Why think about this now? What did it matter? He would never get to know his answer. Even though he'd waited and waited to see him again, to be able to talk with him again ..._

...

Three men were marching over a hill, their path lit by the reddish first rays of the rising sun. Despite still dressed in yukatas, shimmering blades were fastly tightened on their belts. A serious expression moulded all of their faces, enhanced by steadfast steps to radiate a stern feel from their figures. Everything about them indicated something important was about to happen. Nonetheless, a certain undertone of hope and expectation peeked its way through their behaviour and dialogue.

The long-haired samurai picked up the conversation: "Will he really be there? You never know what those traitorous scoundrels might be up to. I don't trust them. They're not the kind of samurai who stay true to their oaths."

"We did as they asked, Zura," the shining silver-headed warrior replied exhaustedly, "We released the ill prisoners. And as unreliable as they are, if the bastards have even one shred of honour left, they should go through with their promise and release Sensei." He stood still for a second to check their brightening surroundings a hundredth time.

"You'll see, he'll be there, waiting for us with that goofy smile on his face and girly hair blowing in his eyes as always." He continued hesitantly smiling, trying to suppress the bad feeling he sensed in his gut.

Katsura instantly corrected him: "It's not girly, it's dignified."

The heavy-lidded man scoffed: "It's girly and you know it. All women have long hair. And the era of samurai walking around with that kind of hair is long since past; only those veteran grandpas with Alzheimer's still keep it that way. Besides, they wear it in a top-knot, not loose, you wannabe samurai."

"Some samurai wear it loosely in a ponytail!" the not-so-tradition-upholding nobleman shouted agitatedly.

After getting some respite thanks to crossing a brown stream, he remarked drily: "But wearing it short in the shape of a nest must surely be a rarity."

"That's the natural shape of it, you dimwit!"

"Anything wrong with short?" a smouldering eye burned holes in the noisy pair's skulls.

The loudmouth stared at the one-eyed demon indifferently, before warning Katsura matter-of-factly: "Uh-oh, you triggered Takachiisai(3). Be careful Zura, or he might climb up your legs and try to slap you."

"Ah, Gintoki, we all feel tired, you shouldn't – " but the warrior quickly got interrupted by an exasperated Takasugi.

"If the enemy knows you're part of our delegation, I'm sure they'll break off the deal immediately. Your underhanded tactics must be legendary by now. They most likely started calling you a white monster exactly because of that wickedness."

"Huuuuuhhh? Look who's talking! Who was it that assaulted them from the back with his Kiheitai during that last battle? I doubt they'll register that as 'high-minded'!"

"And which rash fool diving into battle without a plan was saved thanks to it?"

"I was only doing reconnaissance to see whether the area was still safe for your troops residing nearby, which it clearly wasn't! I can't help it if they suddenly decided to jump me upon discovery! So you should thank me for alerting you!"

"Reconnaissance? You can't even sneak up on one enemy! You sure you didn't slink away to inhale your monthly quota of sugar?"

"You saying I can't be stealthy, drunkard? Wanna bet?! First one to set fire at an enemy's camp wins! Double points if it's the food stock."

"You're on. Place of rendezvous is at this big tree. Return here within the hour."

Electricity ran between Gintoki's and Takasugi's eyes.

"THIS IS NOT THE PLACE NOR THE TIME TO BE DOING THESE SORT OF IDIOTIC GAMES!" Katsura bellowed, shocked the two rivals could even be considering this.

In spite of the heavy banter fired up by the men's drowsiness, the reckless samurai couldn't ignore this detached feeling of uneasiness. The hunch had settled itself in the fighter's heart ever since the battle with that Naraku bastard. Gintoki actually had to defend himself with Shouyou-sensei's old katana during the skirmish, and that had finally been its limit. Upon impact with the enemy's sword, the blade part under the hilt had broken into thousands of tiny little stars. Breaking your blade was never a good sign, especially not in the midst of a battle. Nevertheless, it had diminished the swinging speed of the other's weapon at that instant. Gintoki ultimately survived, with the stinging of no more than a small scar above his heart to remember him of the ferocious fight. From then on however, he hadn't been able to shrug off the feeling something had gone very wrong with sensei. The young adult had tried to dismiss the feeling of course; he wasn't one to be superstitious. _With the exception of ghosts maybe. _He had blamed it on fatigue, and carried on without telling a soul about it. But the feeling stubbornly stayed, and he even got the impression it grew stronger until it had finally reached its peak during the last few days.

After striding on for about half an hour, the three samurai at long last reached their destination. In the valley, the ruins of a small village stood solemly in the middle of abandoned rice fields, crossed by a small gurgling river. Clouds were crowding the sky by now. Their target was the destroyed paddy field near the entrance of the village; that's where Shouyou-sensei should've been dropped off.

Upon nearing the agreed on place however, no traces of the enemy or even a human being could be seen. Only one thing was moderately eye-catching in the whole neighbourhood. In the middle of the heavily ruined rice field, a tied white cotton bag stood lonely out against the brown mud. A low rumble could be heard in the skies over the far-away mountains. The whole picture seemed surreal.

"There seems to be a note attached to it." Katsura whispered, as if afraid to break the silence. Gintoki only stared, and didn't dare to come close to it. He knew. Somehow he knew what it was. He had felt it in his gut for quite a while, after all. The only thing the trembling former student could afford to do, was turn away and wait to hear his premonition confirmed.

As if in slow-motion, Takasugi kneeled down next to the bag, and clutched the letter. He opened it, and read in an uncharacteristic soft voice: "As promised. Here is your master, stray mutts." With quivering and hasty movements, he opened the bag.

The sudden gasps from behind the averted grim youngster set his worst nightmare in stone. Despite everything, he couldn't help but peek. Bad idea. The dead face of his beloved sensei glared right at him. The calm expression and closed eyes didn't lessen his shock.

The earth seemed to open itself under his feeth. A falling sensation took control over him. He lost all sense of self and place. The same. His surroundings abruptly started to look and feel the same as back then. Before the very life-changing day he met sensei. The colours in the scenery before him rapidly faded away to black and white, as the same feelings of loneliness and rejection suddenly rushed back to him. Until now, that had felt like an eternity ago. Now it seemed as if he had never kindly been picked up and given an home.

As Gintoki sank deeper and deeper in his despair, he vagely noticed some differences in the picture. The blurred landscape he saw through his eyes didn't only exist of the colours black and white. Erratic splashes of red could be distinguished on the monochromatic canvas. Red? Even his always keen nose and alert ears seemed to fail him. In fact, only some sort of ringing sound could be heard. What was this? Had his body completely shut down? Whatever the case, it wasn't entirely the same as in the past ... It wasn't the same! Not at all! He wasn't wandering the battlefields in search for food! And he most certainly wasn't a little kid anymore! He was Sakata Gintoki, fighting on battlefields with his comrades to save a very cherished person!

With the realization came the harsh plunge back to reality. Shouyou-sensei was dead. Their dear, beloved teacher who mercifully took him in as a vagabond and henceforth saved his life ... was no more. They had been fighting to save him, and failed. All of their hard battles and way too many sacrifices – all for naught. It was a disaster. The enemy couldn't have hit them harder.

"Those despicable crow bastards ..." he gritted through his teeth.

A white flash brightened the terrain for a second. Gintoki looked at the sky. Not long after, a low rumble resonated over the fields, louder than before. A thunder storm was definitely coming their way. He could already feel the water droplets fall on his breast. Slowly but surely, the silver-headed samurai came back to his senses. Colours faded back into view as sounds and smells could be distinguished again. The rain probably helped to clear his head. Although ... now that he thought about it, no sign of falling rain could be seen, heard or smelled. Then what was dripping on his breast? As Gintoki reached for his upper body part, more water drops fell on his hands, so he raised his hands ever more up to his chin and face. Despite the lack of rain, his face felt very wet, especially his chin and the region under his eyes.

_Tear ... drops ...?_

All of a sudden, a shadow pounced without warning on the absent-minded warrior from behind. The battle-hardened youngster immediately shifted his weight and turned his torso in an unnatural reflex, so the assailant wouldn't land squarely on him. As both people fell down the figure consequently made a beautiful faceplant in what must've been the dirtiest and muddiest part of the ruined field. What rose up from the liquid earth was unmistakingly a brown bubble slime, laughing in an annoying tone despite his situation.

"Gahahahaha! Whoops, I tripped over some lingering basketball! Gahahaha! But that was mean of you to not catch me, Kintoki!"

"Idiots can't choke to death, so don't worry Bakamoto. Believe me, I've tried countless times with a certain space-minded idiot. And I've also told him countless times it's **Gin**toki. I can try again if you really want to 'though." The silver-with-some-specks-of-brown-headed man replied with dark, threatening eyes.

"Please allow me to sever his neck from its body first, Gintoki." Katsura proposed out of nowhere, pulling his katana out of its sheath. His eyes spelled serious trouble. Usually the noble samurai proved to be the calmest leader among the Joui Four. What had Sakamoto done to anger him so much? Or had he lost his mind? Before he could ask, Katsura already brandished his blade and swung down.

Sakamoto yelped: "W-w-wait, Zura! What's the matter? Are you still mad I accidentally told everyone you landed that widow? Or is it because of the basketball? Was it your most precious ball?"

Gintoki was confused. Basketball? What basketball? Was there a basketball on this terrain? Or did Zura suddenly grow such big b*lls Bakamoto mistook them for basketballs?

"Yoouuuuu ..." the rest of Katsura's words were a rapid-fire string of words, barely comprehensible to the small audience, "It's-not-Zura,-it's-Katsura.-It-was-not-accidental,-it-was-shouted.-It-was-not-a-widow,-it-was-a-new-bride.-It's-not-a-basketball,-it's-Shouyou-sensei's-head.-It's-not-my-most-precious-ball,-it's-my-most-precious-sensei's-head!" the incensed samurai sliced with bloodshot eyes at the heedless perm after every sentence.

The distraught Gintoki shot a look at his cherished sensei's head, and his face went a very pale colour. The head was now lying on its side in the mud, covered with dirt and dried up blood.

"_Whoops, I tripped over some lingering basketball! Gahahaha!"_

He stood up and walked over to Katsura, laying a hand on his shoulder. "Wait Zura, don't be so hasty."

"Kintoki! Yes thank you, Gahahaha! Please explain it to him! Besides, why is your sensei's head lying here anyway?" Sakamoto interjected full of hope.

"Let me help you," the equally outraged Shiroyasha briskly continued, "Some idiots can never be cured anyway. It's best to make them experience a short pain instead of stretching it out."

The long-haired warrior replied matter-of-factly: "It's not a short pain, it'll be a long one."

...

After being satisfied of cutting up Sakamoto, Katsura finally noticed the absence of Takasugi.

"Wait. Where is Takasugi?" he wondered aloud, "He was here with us, wasn't he?"

Gintoki was still stomping on the corpse that used to be a clumsy samurai dreaming of space. After those words, the corpse sprang back to life as if they were God's breath filling him with life.

"Ahh, right! Bakasugi! That's what I tried to warn you about! I almost forgot, Gahahahahahaha!"

Both upright warriors looked down on him. Deadpan eyes locked with thoughtless eyes.

"Not dead yet?" the former readied his blade above his head and put himself in front of Sakamoto, "Guess I'll make sure this time then. Takasugi probably just walked back on his own anyway."

The brown-haired perm started flailing around. "Wait wait wait! Kintoki, I'm serious! It's really important!" the silver perm held back for a moment, "I and my group came looking for you, because none of the descriptions of the people leaving this package here added up to this Sensei guy of yours! When we arrived at the entrance of the valley however, Takasugi already calmly walked up to us. As we tried to tell him everything, he cut us short with a frightening 'I know'. I then asked him whether he was returning home, to which he lividly answered, and I'm quoting him letter by letter now," he suddenly switched to a melodramatic tone: " 'Go back? Are you crazy? - Don't answer that. With those cowards freely running around, me leisurely returning? No no no, that won't do. Not at all ...' "

"So? That idiot went to aimlessly get revenge. What's that got to do with me?"

"Ghahahaha, who's the idiot here? Don't you get it, Kintoki? He's going after that camp we recently discovered. It's him without his Kaientai versus an army five hundred men big. He won't return alive. Besides, that enemy base has nothing to do with your sensei's death. He's pretty much trying to crush the toe for what the hand has done, Ghahahaha!"

Gintoki shrugged gloomily. "Why not let him do as he wants? He's big enough to fend for himself, isn't he?"

Katsura disagreed with a frown: "Sakamoto is right. What Takasugi is attempting to do now, is pretty much suicide. You have to stop him, Gintoki".

"Why me?! What about you?!" the wild perm countered indignant.

"Are you mad? You know how he is. There's no way I can stop him. I don't want to die yet. I know I can count on you however, Gintoki." He proudly patted the Shiroyasha's shoulder.

"Gahahahaha! Right you are, Zura! As for me, I prefer to talk it over and make a deal, but that guy really hates it for some reason ... Not to mention he always gets really angry and readies his weapon whenever I get near him. I really don't understand him. Besides, hasn't it been some time since you've had a 'talk' with him right now? You're always fighting, I'd think now would also be a perfect opportunity, no?"

"No fighting! Just try to persuade him, Gintoki!" the dignified warrior reacted alarmed.

The samurai grumbled a bit, then grudgingly set himself in motion. Neither of those two blockheads would go after the prick, no matter what. The perspective to persuade the highly explosive scoundrel wasn't attractive to any of them. They knew Gintoki would go nevertheless.

He ran as the wind. That dumb runt couldn't have gotten too far yet. He was walking after all, at fast pace maybe, but still walking. Moving one quick step after another towards the damn obvious death trap. The jaws stood wide open, and he would run straight into it.

"_Our comrades ... everyone ... please protect them for me, okay?"_

Gintoki clenched his jaw. Everything was going completely wrong! For years, actually. If that bastard managed to make it even worse ...

He swept through the area, looking for even the slightest hint of a one-eyed midget. How hard could it be to find that?! There weren't that many people with those specific characteristics to find here! Certainly not on these abandoned fields!

After running for what seemed like hours, eventually a little figure loomed at the horizon. Was that him? _God, paper, demons, scissors, whatever ... please let that be him! I want to go home already! _As Gintoki approached, he noticed that it indeed was the dumbass still strutting on. The aggravated swordsman didn't even look back or stop when the white-dressed samurai was so near he could almost touch him. Indeed, right when the weary warrior wanted to speak, the scrub scorned at him.

"What?!"

Nothing more, nothing less. Although taken a bit aback, the heavy-lidded teenager took a deep breath, and decided to try and persuade him after all.

"Stop it. This isn't the way, and you know it."

"Huh?! I don't understand what you mean. Or are you thinking those cowards will come back as ghosts, and you're afraid to incite their revenge? In that case, no need to worry, those dishonourable bastards can't come back as ghosts, they're too weak. And anyway, I don't need your help, I'll do it by myself."

Gintoki jumped in front of him, and grabbed him by his hem. "You Koropokkuru(4), have you become so small that your brain has shrunk too?! Attacking a known enemy camp on your own will both kill you and our comrades. Are you really willing to let them know we are aware of their position, and risk them noticing our headquarters's presence?!"

The one-eyed warrior glared at him, then at his hem, then back at him. After a moment, he calmly said: "Look, there's a hitodama at your left shoulder."

"Eeeeeeeeehhhhhhhh?!" the superstitious samurai promptly released the vengeful warrior and ducked away to his right.

"Other left, you dumbass." Takasugi dusted off his hem, threw a disgusted look at the samurai on the ground, and moved on again.

The panicking teenager checked his real right side this time, realized he was stupidly fooled, and pounced like a cat on his one-eyed comrade. The latter lost his balance and fell disgracefully to the ground. As he slowly picked himself up, all false collectedness had been wiped from his face.

"Yooouuuuuu ... want me to kill you first ...?!" The enraged youngster brandished his katana with much gusto.

"Oi oi, why don't you try to use your brain instead of your sword?! Seriously, what do you gain by – " the pouncer tried to argue, but was cut short by a blade swung at him. Rolling out of the way, he asked shocked: "Are you serious?!"

"I'd say deadly so!" his attacker replied with a wicked smile.

_No way around this then. I tried, guys. So don't criminate me afterwards. I did my best. Now I'll have to smack this tiny brain down._

Both warriors put themselves in fighting position. Despite already knowing it wouldn't work, they tried to stare each other down. No deal. Takasugi initiated the first attack. As he set a foot forward, he swung his blade to his rival's left side, only to change direction midway and go for his right side. Gintoki was an equally seasoned warrior however, if not more, and blocked it successfully with his own katana. He dived under the other's scrawny legs, and turned around his axis to hit at his side. The Kiheitai leader had already repositioned himself 'though, and took a new swing, this time directed at the eyes. The Shiroyasha ducked again, scooped up some mud and threw it at his opponent's eye while targeting his left side. Barely avoiding the thrown dirt, the one-eyed swordsman parried the next strike with force.

"Typical. You always need to use those unscrupulous schemes during competitions. You're starting to bore me."

"WHAT ... THE HELL ... ARE YOU IDIOTS ... DOOOIIIIIIING?!"

A third samurai came running up the hill with his long black hair wildly waving in the wind. He looked pretty tired, as he supported his weight with his hands on his knees upon arrival straight away, puffing like a madman.

Both opponents spoke at the same time, without averting their attention from each other: "Zura, don't interfere." The simultaneous spoken words caused them to glare even angrier at each other.

Said person exclaimed desperately anyway: "Do not act so selfish! This is really moronic! Gintoki, I asked you to **persuade** him, did I not?"

"He didn't want to. Couldn't be helped." The alert fighter still didn't turn away his eyes from his rival.

"Urgh, I shouldn't have counted on you for persuasion. But know you're fighting for no reason at all. I've listened to the description of that enemy camp, Takasugi, and it is my strong belief it probably won't stay here for long."

As if called on, Sakamoto suddenly appeared on a Kiso horse to support Katsura's theory. He stepped off the animal ridden by a Kaientai member, and concurred: "Ghahahaha, it's as you predicted, Zura! Ghahaha ... haha ... ha ... hm ... hm! ... hm!" For some reason, he proceeded on laughing with closed mouth, until he seemed to try gasping for air with a hand on his mouth.

"Sakamoto! You alright?!" Katsura asked worriedly while reaching out to the troubled messenger. Even the two hotheads finally stopped their staring duel to take a look at him. Out of nowhere, the Kaientai leader vomited his last meal, straight on hitting the concerned warrior.

He apologized regretfully with a hand scratching in his fuzzy hair: "Oops, sorry Zura. I get seasick so easily ..."

"You were on a **horse**! how can you get seasick from a horse?!" Gintoki shouted incredulous, forgetting momentarily he was fighting a few minutes ago.

"Beats me, ghahahahaha! Anyway, back on the matter at hand, that enemy camp was really only temporary! In fact, they've already left now as we speak! I guess it was indeed strange they were only housed in tents with this storm coming up! My man here can tell you the specifics, right Susume-san?" he turned to address the horseback rider, only to notice the man had already left after dropping him off. All that remained was the trail of horse footprints in the earth.

The bloodthirsty, one-eyed samurai cursed. "You bastards. If you hadn't stopped me, I would've still been on time. Now our foes managed to run away. All because of you!" His menacing eye fired sparks at them while he mainly directed his forefinger at his silver-headed rival.

"Oi ..."

"Without you fools, sensei would've received his first gifts in the Afterworld. But you're too cowardly to avenge his death. Don't show yourselves to me when not necessary, you weaklings. Rather, just stay away from me. Or I'll carve you a new breathing hole." Takasugi stomped away, leaving Gintoki and Katsura behind in a daze. Sakamoto just laughed irritably, but fortunately returned back to headquarters himself, despite Takasugi's threats.

After a long silence, the defiled samurai finally interrupted the awkward situation. "D ... Don't worry Gintoki. He'll come through, as always. He's a true samurai after all, despite his roguish tendencies. Everything will be alright." He tried to clean himself up with a raggedy towel he'd hid inside his clothing for some reason.

_Worry? Me? About that Bakasugi? You've got to be kidding me! What gave him that idea?!_

"In addition, we should rather try focusing on the future, now that ... that ... we've had a severe setback."

Katsura had been eyeing him with a strange expression for a while now. Sadness? Not really. Fear? Kind of, but not entirely. Worry? Maybe ... Or no, rather concern. Yes, that was it. Mixed with his own exhaustion.

_Give me a break. The last thing I need now is pity. Seriously._

"Let's go. I'm tired." The frustrated man told him.

Kling!

He took a heavy step forwards in the mud. On to a very unsure future, forever burdened by the painful feeling of loss and guilt ...

...

_Wait a second. "Kling?" What kind of footstep makes a klinging sound? Something was definitely wrong here!_

Gintoki looked down, only to notice a cup of sake resting against his arm on a wooden bar counter. He blinked.

A bar counter.

Blinking again.

Bar counter still there. But didn't it look somewhat familiar ...?

Then it hit him.

_Oh right. The snack bar. The Christmas party. The wine. The old bat._

The alcohol-thirsting man looked up to see her observe him with sharp eyes, calmly smoking her cigarette. Those penetrating eyes of hers promptly made him feel very uncomfortable on his bar stool, and he wished she'd cut it out soon. It took too long to his liking. At the instant he eventually decided to tell her off politely, she turned her deep brown eyes away to look at Shinpachi and Kagura. The kids were now singing karaoke in front of the television, along with Tae, Catherine and Tama. Gintoki breathed a sigh of relief.

"It doesn't suit you to be sitting morosely in a corner while the others are having fun," Otose whispered, "You should at least have a drink when you're doing that."

Gintoki directed his gaze at the glittering sake, then back again at the sympathetic woman. "Hmph. I also crave for some time on my own sometimes, you nag," he retorted, "Gin-chan can't stand in the spotlight all the time, you know. He needs a breather sometimes to reflect on his day. Every now and then, moments of silence are necessary to realize the important aspects of life." He raised his cup, then downed it all in one gulp.

Silence. There definitely had been no lack of it ever since discovering Sensei's head. The Joui four had barely spoken to each other during the following days, only informing each other of the bare necessities. Even the fact everyone had been cramped up in the dojo due to the raging storm hadn't been able to change that. Both Gintoki and Takasugi had taken up drinking quite a few levels. Gintoki's tired eyes had now also been showing a thousand-yard stare, a lifeless gaze into the far-off distance that had pronounced his dead-fish eyes even more. Takasugi meanwhile hadn't resorted to passiveness; even when heavily intoxicated, he made up ridiculous ambitious plans, all disconcertingly focused on revenge. His aggressiveness hadn't suffered either, quite on the contrary. Sakamoto had had to act much more nimble than ever before, because his excessive positivity bordering idiocy and loose tongue had nearly reduced the Joui Four to the Joui Three several times. And Takasugi had actually been _really_ going for the kill. Fortunately, Gintoki had taken it upon him to save the natural idiot every now and then, which had strained the bond between the two rivals even more. Even though their relationship nowadays had already practically reached its lowest point in years. Katsura on the other hand had been wandering around like a headless chicken whenever present, not knowing how to resolve the situation, or how to cope with the emptiness in his heart. He much preferred to visit the landowner's sister, who had lost her husband over a year ago and had tended to him when he had arrived drenched in Sakamoto's puke. The war had encountered a true standstill on the rebels' side.

"Gintoki."

A heavily wrinkled face suddenly loomed before the distracted samurai like a demon. It caused him to shriek and duck behind his bar stool.

"O-O-O-Onibaba?!"

"Who's an onibaba, you damn perm?!" Otose countered offended, contorting her old face even more. She continued after a little pause: "Seriously, you should relax a bit and focus more on the noisy kids. You're their father figure in a sense now with their real fathers gone, after all. Plus, that monster girl of yours is about to break my television. That'll be added to your rent."

He watched Kagura badly sing the Katoken Samba, while swinging the device around like a merry go round and crashing it into Shinpachi on the way. Where had Tae gone off to? She was usually about the only one who could halt the whirlwind with a single word. Despite this, Tama desperately tried her best to stop the swirling girl, both for the tv's and boy's sakes. Catherine on the other hand made sure to write everything down that might've even barely touched the kids. Probably including the stuff she damaged herself. He'd receive a humongous bill again.

"A father, eh? What's having a son like, anyway? And the tv was already broken, you hag."

"Hmph, why ask me? I never had one. But I can easily imagine they must be really troublesome. And it still worked, you stingy pauper."

"Never wanted to have one?" Gintoki looked at her enquiringly.

"Have one?" she echood, while staring at him. There were the troublesome eyes again. Then the old landlady replied softly: "It was never really a matter of 'wanting' one, but rather of getting the chance to perceive one. Or a kid in general."

"Oh. right. Sorry." he answered, lost in thought again. _Did Sensei ever want a son?_ _Hadn't Gintoki imposed on him by living in the same house? He had practically taken over all the space a possible family could've used. Had sensei really been okay with that all the time? He seemed to have been. Not once had he ever mentioned missing the warmth of a family. Didn't that kind of mean Gintoki had somehow ... adopted a son's presence around him? Or was he being too conceited now? But if he had ..._ He unintentionally blurted out the next question in his train of thought: "But if you had someone like a son, would you be proud of him?"

She goggled at him for a good while, causing him to immediately regret his loud-mouthedness. After a moment of silence, she watched the festive group again, a little smile creeping up in her face. Eventually Otose moved over to the group, but not before disclosing something to the low-spirited warrior.

"Well, you're plenty enough to show me what a son is like, so there's no need for a hypothetical question. I don't need one more," she stroked the corner of the bar counter for a second, "And a penniless lazy NEET or not, a son is a son. As long as he makes the best of what life gives him, you'd always be proud as a parent. No matter what mistakes he might've made in the past."

The words didn't immediately sink in until the old woman was already halfway the room. Gintoki gaped at her with big eyes, too astonished to respond. It took him a while to recover from his initial shock, but he finally gave somewhat of an answer back, smiling contently.

"Heh. Is that so. I guess I was super lucky to have met such great parent replacements in my life then."

Otose meanwhile reached the core of the premature party. She pulled Kagura out of the chaos by an ear, before proceeding on scolding her harshly. The yato girl however completely ignored her words, as she was rather occupied with a strange phenomenon on the landlady's face.

"Eww, the granny has become a real monster. Why did she paint her eyes in that fashion?"

Shinpachi struggled to stand up, and noticed to his own horror what Kagura meant. "O-O-Otose-san?! What happened?! You've got blotted eyes! Are you alright?! Why are you weeping?!"

Catherine started to cuss, and angrily questioned the secretively smiling elder. "Who did it?! Who gave you blue eyes, Otose-san?! I'll kill him! I'll strip him naked! He won't possess a single thing anymore after I'm done with him!"

...

At the bar, Gintoki refilled his cup with sake in all serenity.

"_Our comrades ... Everyone ... Please protect them for me, okay? Let's make it a promise."_

"_Please take care of her...Take care of our town..."_

The silver-haired samurai raised the cup.

_It's a promise alright._

And drank it all in one go.

* * *

If you wonder where certain missing characters are: Sadaharu is sleeping upstairs. He partied too much with the neighbourhood dogs yesterday. Tae went chasing after a cockroach. Kondou is recovering from being killed (RIP). Sacchan passed by when Tae was beating him up, and accidentally received a pole to the face. She's still looking for her glasses in Australia. Katsura is on standby with Elizabeth outside the snack bar, expecting to get a signal for helping to recount the flashback. The others still need to arrive for the real party. Including Sakamoto, as he's on his way to crash into their building. Takasugi meanwhile is destroying things as always, mainly his yukata gifts with decorated butterflies.

Also, very sorry about the blasphemy with Shouyou. I just suck at keeping emotional moments serious for too long. I just can't. In all honesty, I still think it's funny. But I'm expecting others won't like it as much 'though. In my defense, Sakamoto IS the sort of guy to whom such a thing would happen. Again, really sorry.


End file.
